Game review 59: Sportac
An athletics board game? Interesting… but does it fall at the first hurdle?
Generally desperate to combine my love of The Olympics with my love of board games, my quest to find as many events as possible draws an almost near blank when it comes to athletics.
Odd, isn’t it? A genuine gap in the market. Track and field is, for many, the absolute cornerstone of the Games.
While racing games for cars and ‘orses have been done to death successfully on the tabletop, very little effort has been made to replicate something similar for something as simple as competitive running humans.
And while dexterity has been incorporated into many board games, little has been done to convert those mechanics to mini versions of the discus, long jump and javelin (probably just as well for that last one, unless you’re wearing safety goggles).
So my search results in me digging this marinated old sort: Sportac, an attempt to replicate athletics and a few other Olympic events from a time that the 20th century forgot. Opening the box practically reveals a whiff of 1970s mouldy sportswear and bad haircuts.
So, 25 events. That seems promising, at least. Unlike one of those Epyx Video games from the 80s, which almost teased the player with their lack of events (sometimes as few as five), 25 seems like it’ll provide a decent tabletop recreation of a good old track meet? Right?
Oh you poor deluded sport fan. Apart from the 70s athletes on the cover, there is a warning sign in this multicoloured pastel, angular travesty of a game board. They really don’t make ‘em like this anymore. Phew.
But let’s put aesthetics aside: is Sportac a good game that stands the test of time?
No.
However, is it a game that will connect to track and field fanatics, allowing them to incorporate it into their gaming night to get the thrill of the race in miniature form?
Also no.
Look, slagging off a near-50-year-old game is not how I want to spend my time, but Sportac is a disaster on every conceivable level. Basic roll-and-move mechanics for running events are somehow made even worse by runners taking up two lanes in their running stride, with a movement mechanic like draughts.
Field events such as high jump are just a case of stick or twist. Others are incomprehensible. My daughter seems to enjoy the simplicity of some events momentarily but soon loses interest.
If Sportac was a sprinter, it would have jumped out of the blocks, not realised it had tied its shoelaces together, staggered backwards over its lane number, and fallen and smacked its head open on the now-bloodied track. Where it would lay, twitching.
Game facts and stats
Year published
1975
Publisher
House Martin
Designer
Uncredited
Player count
2–4
E’s review
What do you like best about the game?
“I do love it and it has lots of games. There was one where we had to go over the number.”
Is it tricky?
“It was a bit hard.”
Marks out of 10
20/10
My review
Set-up time
For most events, a minute. Add a couple more on for those involving hurdles.
Price
No more than £7-£8 on eBay.
Practicality
A light box, but standard vintage size. The board is flimsy and will need looking after.
Fun for parents
No, not even in a ‘so-bad-it’s-good way. Not even in a nostalgic sense. Maybe someone will do a good athletics tabletop game at some point. But I’m still looking for it.